Thanksgiving is a special holiday because it focuses on valuing and being grateful for the things we have. But something about that feels a little strange… why do we need a holiday to teach us to be thankful? Don’t we appreciate the things we have every day?
Sadly, the research says we don’t. Dr. Aaron Ben-Zeév observed that “negative emotions are more noticeable than positive ones since attending to negative events is more important for our survival than attending to positive events”. That is supported by a research study by Amrisha Vaish which determined that “adults display a negativity bias, or the propensity to attend to, learn from, and use negative information far more than positive information.” So there is a scientific basis for our negativity, so perhaps it’s good that we have reminders to be grateful, thankful, and appreciative. But wouldn’t it be better to adopt a more positive attitude beyond the holiday?
This is where it becomes important to be intentional about your actions and to create more intentionality to positive emotions as we do negative emotions. One way to do this is to just get into the habit of thanking people regularly, even for little things, to show your gratitude. This lets them know they’re doing something right and will hopefully reinforce what they’re already doing right. We should be doing this for our friends, family, and even people we may not know very well to let them know we’re appreciative.
On that same note, another way to show appreciation is by writing a review for the services or products provided by businesses you frequent. Not only will this benefit their business, but it will also allow others to have positive experiences themselves. Different research has shown that people are between 2 and 10 times more likely to write a negative review than a positive review. But why? Is it because we’re afraid to address things directly to make things right? Is it because it’s easier to vent using an anonymous review? The National Strategic Group found that “about 20% of negative reviews come from a feeling of vengeance”. That sounds a little damning, but it also found that we are often inspired to write reviews because of a “heightened emotion response”, as a way “for consumers to stroke their ego”, and with “the intention of influencing others”. While those could result in negative reviews, they could just as easily lead to positive reviews.
The power of positive reviews is demonstrable, especially on platforms like Google, Facebook, or Yelp. These reviews make a difference where people choose to spend their money and time. In a digital age where online presence is vital, a positive review can be the deciding factor for someone looking for a reliable and exceptional service provider. On this Thanksgiving and through Christmas, consider expressing your gratitude for exceptional service and experiences you've had with companies you support. Let them know you appreciate their friendliness or the quality of their service. Tell others why you’ve trusted them in the past and what keeps you returning. If they’ve been consistently good, let people know. And if they went above and beyond what you expected, definitely share that story as well. Positive word-of-mouth is a powerful tool for businesses and they’ll appreciate that you’ve shared your experiences with others.
- John Thrush